My Hierarchy of Friends and lovers
Ang artikulong ito ay orihinal na ginawa ni Gilbert Masong Velasco, walang pinagkopyahan, gawang utak lamang.. Walang sinuman ang maaaring umangkin o gumaya ng nasabi artikulo.. (copyright, heheheh) Kung mayroon kayong mga suhesyon o karagdagan sa nasabing artikulo ay maaring i-kumento. Kung may wrong spelling or grammar, pabayaan nyo na.. Well, know you know that i qualify the persons in my life, so where are you here?
The Hierarchy of Relationship
For me, there is a level of relationship and i quantify and qualify all of my relationships. But as we all know, life is unpredictable, meaning even if i have this kind of logic there are instances that people interprets things in their own. This is an article focusing on my views on the relationship of man as a friend or a lover.
STRANGER to FRIENDS
Total stranger - dont know anything, face, name, any biological info.
Stranger - people you see everyday, dont know their names though. A person you once saw their face, know the name but never met them nor know their personality (like in books, TV or any media).
phone/Chat/txt/letter buddy - There are some people who chats on the internet or have textmates. some saw their names and pictures in social networking sites, might have shared alot of personal things and info, but not really met them personally. for me impressions are very important, so as long as i dont see the person in reality, i dont believe them immediately, nor their photos or stories.
Acquaintances - People you met, knew their names. shared somethings but never really made enough connections for you to qualify him/her as a friend.
Part-time friends - These are acquaintances that lasted longer. you shared some bonds but somehow ended. most likely persons who is in your group but lasted less than a year. I can also add people who you became friends with and then left you for the other group of friends. We can say that these people are what we thought we're really friends with, unfortunately, some here became our enemies or those friends that changed radically that we don't know them at all and we don't want them anymore.
Friends (group/troop/barkada)- these are friends we always hangout with, go to their places and became drinking buddies. we share a lot of things with them, even our house, our personalities and our money. they are the people who somehow we trust and share our lives with. but somehow these friend are the friends that you normally just hangout with. You never had any deep connections with these persons.just a group. They are the people who you chose not to talk your secrets with, or somehow not prefer to talk with your personal aspects. they have an understanding of you but you may easily fall into arguments with them.
Close friends - These friends are friends you share some secrets with. you can talk one on one. they will tell you advices and be there for you in most cases. you more preferably be with them than the whole group. they are the ones who you chose to bond a lot longer, making it years or more. these friends always think of you and cares for you. they are also can be a potential brotherly or sisterly connection. they are your friends that you dont really know if they are your bestfriends. since no one actually tells one another that your bestfriends. many great lovers passed this stage before finding their real emotions that their deeply in love. and if one told someone that this friend is the one he/she chooses to be with, it would only fall into two categories.. the bestfriend and the lover.
True friends - this in under the close friend qualification. some of your close friends who doesn't fail and always eager to help. those friends who never misses giving you an advice, even without gift always been in your bdays. most people dont want bestfriends but true friends. those friends who never misjudge you. those people who will not tolerate your misdeeds, but helps you understand what is right.
Best friends - I admit i had alot. when i was young i thought bestfriends are people who is been with you alot longer. however, an incident told me i was wrong. i told a friend of mine that i dont want to be bestfriends with him yet since we are just in the start of our friendship and told him that it'll take time for us to know if we are really the best of friends. but i was wrong. what if there is no time to prove that? what if those times you spent together are the only time you can prove to one another that you are worth being the BEST of FRIEND. when someone asked me to become their bestfriend, of course for me it was a privilege and its really hard to decline someone offering their BEST friendship. maybe thats why i had a lot of bestfriends. people ask me, isnt bestfriend should be only ONE. thats why its called the BEST. i tell them. yes its true, but what i said, i cant just decline them. and also friends come in different times. some came early, some came last. its not a crime to have a lot of BESTfriends, but you must bear in mind the responsibility. being bestfriends is mutual,meaning, both parties should treat one another fairly. if one fails then your BESTFRIEND thingy is a fake and just a "WORD". dont let it be just a word. try to save each friendship and make it work, so that you can prove that you friendship means alot. I know i have a lot of issues with my so called BESTFRIENDS. but even though i know its just a "word", i cant say its fake. coz i know to myself that i was worth of being that and I'm trying to prove to them what my worth. I'm giving my best to them that why i cant say its fake, but for others they say it is. i cant blame them, coz that is what they see. its just hard to accept the fact that I'm the only one giving my share.
Bestfriend are eventually your true friends. they are your closest friends that will never let you down and always help you. of course you both stick to one another and gives equal and fair responsibilities to one another. for me being bestfriend is a commitment of giving everything you've got, excepts nothing in return, but take note.. your bestfriend should be the same and fair like you are. Like love, friendship will never work if only one is being fair. Thats why successful lovers are mostly their bestfriends. They share everything, being honest, loyal and keeping their faith with one another. And bestfriends never gamble their friendship and never hesitates to tell them secrets and never hesitates to help even if it is against your moral conduct.
LOVE TALK
Idol - these people you look up with. this is not about gender or sexuality. different from crush. you try to copy some of those people's traits including looks, their fashion, their types, their interests etc. in the past, when you say idol, these are holy things ancient people pray to. but nowadays, idol represents people with great deeds or aspiring looks/fashion that people favor to and make them somehow inspire to eagerly try to be like them as well.
Crush - these works mostly in opposites (including the 3rd sex). People get crushes on the other person and somehow they thought it was love. some say its the "love at first sight", however its just a crush. people get crushes mainly because of physical aspects. it is like idolism in the opposite sex. crushes are mainly physical attraction, coz the other is good-looking, sexy and hot, is an actor or has a great talent. people starts to fall in love and make their moves in this step.
Love at first sight - how can you say you felt this when you saw him/her? well, i do believe in love at first sight. it really does not violate the crush thingy but like they say there is something different. when you feel this, your heart bursts, and
the first time you held hands, your heart pumps more heavily, you cant take your eyes off the person and even if your shy, you will have the urge and take your shot in knowing the person no matter what. How can i say this, did i experienced this? well partially, i thought it was really love at first sight. coz, love at fist sight come in both ways, meaning it should be mutual. That both of you felt the same way for the first time you meet.
Friends and Lovers - Some people wanted to be loved but doesnt want the "commitment". Friends who share pleasures with each other. friends who are cheating with their partners but dont want to leave them due to some BENEFIT they're getting. Most of the younger generation are into this scheme. Does who wanted attention and pleasure goes bar hopping and pick anyone they like. some made one-night-stands and then gone, and sometimes including their prized possession.
1night-stands - people who seek pleasure only. some maybe accidental but both came to a merge of lust. a responsible person would not let them into any of this. but since we are young, no commitments and pleasure is what we are after. being single, available yet having their lust satisfied is a youngster's dream. paid nights can be also in this category as long its only one night coz if it becomes more often then you fall in the above category.
Part-time Love - this is what we call short time love or "shota". they are your normal girlfriends or boyfriends that never lasted long. They are mostly your crush and you never got along during the relationship. Those relationship that are only for some benefits.
Fake Love - Actually like friends and lovers. but this is the person who dont want to leave the other person and stayed in the relationship even if their feelings are not real. for them giving pleasure in their fake love is the main aspect. they tell themselves that they need to be with the person and will do anything for that person even if their hearts feel nothing about him/her. they do this mostly for money, fame and lust.
Real Love - This is the love of our life. the reality of love where couples fight and then makes-up. make love not just coitus. Those couples who try everything to keep the relationship intact until they have children. Some of the couples after having children end up being whole or not. however the love they felt is real even if they are in their separate ways now.
Perfect Love - True/best friends that wind up together. They might have arguments but each arguments will keep their bond more stronger and they will understand each other more.
Adultery - This is a crime when one of the couple leaves one for the third party. the law applies only in married couples though. but as we know, this happen and i think half of the couples experiences adultery at one point wether they know about it or not.
Eternal Love - Like in teleseries, a never ending love. a love that even death cannot conquer. I've known and seen some that the person still marries the other even when the other is in their final breath or even in their coffin. or in other case, when their love one passed away, the other will soon die as well in an accident, suicide or age.
Destined Love - Well, since we're talking about love, you might have thought if i believe in destiny. Some might have figure out the answer. Just for the others, well... OF COURSE... If i believe in love at first sight how come not in destiny. well to simply put this, love at first sight is somehow like serendipity or destined love but as what i said, should be mutual. Destined love is also believing that everything happens for a reason. When a person meet the other AGAIN in a very unusual place to meet and something caught their senses and felt the love at first sight thingy for the 2nd time.
I appreciate your time in reading this article... Thank you much!!!
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